Allo! Allo! It Is Me... Sinclair!

It's been nong nong ago, nong nong ago... since I updated this oh-so dusty, cobweb-infested blog...

hee hee hee...

busy is a lame excuse right?

i've not been busy...

we've been traveling, we've been 'hari raya-ing', feasting, visiting, auditioning, singing, dancing, freaking out and many other -ings...

u might see some action going on here sometime...

will keep u posted, InsyaAllah

ta ta... off to watch me Whose Line Is It Anyway...

but before I go, here are some pics during ourrecent trip to Ulu Kelang...

here at Stonehenge, them boys trying to jump without farting

Woolacombe, Devon - Daniel & Lyn wedding

Jai & his sister in Buckingham Palace (see if u can spot Her Majesty...)

Lady Luck caught up with THE Jeremy Clarkson

priceless...

Welcome Readers From All Over The World!

USA
UK
Portugal
Spain
Indonesia
Malaysia
Brunei
Canada
Italy
France
Saudi Arabia

One thing I know for sure, "hopper" is an absolute coward lah...

Whore-per Hopper

sad to say, you think i don't know who you are?

BTW, i do... heh heh heh...

yes this is for you bingai, idiotic 'hopper'...

this is my platform, my stage, my space and i'll write, ramble, rant whatever i wish, whatever i want.

who the *toot* you think are to come in here & preach? leave your comments elsewhere...

this is what i have to say to you...

FARK YOU.com

degrading oneself?

so what? it is absolutely none of your lame business, really. so obviously, u bugger have no farking sense of humour. poor sickening idiot... i think you are deprived of you-yourself-know-what... right?

so kaypoh to busybody around here, u farking nosey parker... go mind your mindless business elsewhere.

people all over the world are welcome to read. but you are a farking troublemaker here.

this is a place for fun peace & laughter. not a place to give your sermon, not a place to show your piousness...

if you want to post such comments or bla bla bla, why don't you write your REAL name? why use 'hopper' instead? you scared shit right?

you think you so righteous?

i CHALLENGE you to 'show' yourself.
i DARE you... to identify yourself.

if not - CONFIRM u are nothing but a yayapapaya chicken backside shit!

it is because of one arsehole like you... that could stir unnecessary trouble like this...

IDIOTIC BUGGER YOU!

Republic of NoNoK

I want to tell you a story.

When Sang Nila first stepped on the island of Temasek, the first thing he saw was a woman. She had just finished bathing in the river, and was lying on the bank. She was totally naked. Furthermore, she was spreading her legs, because it was a custom for young women to expose their nonok to the sun. In the experience of the people of Temasek, things exposed to the sun tend to last longer. Experiments had been done with fish, prawns and shrimp. So why not the nonok too, especially since it did not smell very different from many things that came from the sea?

Our good friend Sang Nila was a virgin. He had never seen a naked woman in his life. He knew how to use a bow and arrow, how to tie the 12 pleats to fasten his royal sarong, how to navigate the royal ship. But he had led a protected palace life, and probably could not tell the difference between a nonok and a porcupine. So when he saw the woman’s nonok winking in the sun, the lips parted slightly, moist with both the river water and its own secret secretions, he pointed at it and asked,

‘Bendaharam, tell me, what is that thing? I have never seen anything like it in my entire life.’

‘Which one, your Majesty?’ asked the Bendaharam.

‘That thing there, with the red body and the black mane.’

‘Your Majesty, that thing you are pointing at, is a nonok.’

If you read accounts of Sang Nila’s landing on Temasek, the records always say that he saw an animal with a red body and black mane. Now, I ask you, does that sound like a lion to you? A lion has a yellow body and an orange mane. Even primary school kids will use those colours when they are drawing lions. The only red thing I know with a black mane surrounding it is the beautiful nonok. I can only come to the conclusion that someone censored our real history, and that Sang Nila actually saw a nonok when he set foot here.

I think we would be a very different people if we lived in a country called Nonok. Imagine that. ‘Uniquely Nonok’. That is something really unique. Doesn't the 'nique' go with the 'nok'? In fact, that's how the 'nok' should be pronounced: as 'noque'. Nonoque. Sounds French, doesn't it? I always knew the word had a touch of class.

We will have such exciting tourist destinations like the Nonok Science Centre, the Nonok History Museum and the Nonok Discovery Centre. Tourists will queue up to take a flight on our world-famous Nonok Airlines, to be served first class champagne and caviar by the charming Nonok Girl. I cannot even start to imagine how a Nonok Girl opens the champagne bottle, right in front of you.

Every year, we will send our Miss Nonok to the Miss Universe competition. She will not have a national costume. In fact, she will not wear any costume at all. For variation, maybe one year she will appear shaved, and the next year extra bushy.

We will have a Republic of Nonok Navy and a Nonok Air Force to protect our beloved Nonok from our neighbours. Malaysian and Indonesian forces are to be feared, and newspapers will always print stories about their desire to rape us. We will keep their hard, angry, jealous cocks away from our borders. But we do welcome other cocks from other places, like the US, Europe and Japan. For these, we will willingly spread. Please Uncle Sam, please Hello Kitty, come and press my little red dot. Tickle it, rub it, nibble it, lick it, bite it.

Instead of one National Day, we will have a Nonok Day, one for each month. 12 Nonok Days. Same time each month. Employers will get grumpy and some politicians will lose their temper because of work hours that are lost. But these are some of the inevitable symptoms of celebrating Nonok Day. On that special day, we will sing songs like ‘We Are Nonok’ and ‘Stand Up For Nonok’.

If only this country we are standing on right now is called Nonok, instead of Singapore. I don’t think it’s impossible. I mean, there’s already a Nonok in Sarawak. Maybe we can call that Nonok Kecik, and we can call our country Nonok Besar. For once, we’ll be considered big. And I will definitely become more patriotic. Because I don’t think I will die for a country, but if you ask me if I will die for Nonok, I will say without any shame, Oh Yes yes!

- ALSA BOLEH! -

Tebu Hamidah? ke? Abu Hamidah? ke? Lembu Hamidah?

can die laughing liao...

i got stomach-headache...

Mr Husband & our Danish laughed until they wept...

dedicated to all my G3 especially AJK...

A Penny For My Thought

I so forgotten about it since a few years ago... Until I saw it...

My monthly savings!

I've almost forgotten about this and boy am I glad!
I realized I have put aside some 2 cents worth of coins for my savings & monthly, a fraction of those coins have been & will be saved until I reach a certain age.

Alhamdulillah. I personally think we all need to have savings.
Whether for emergency, or for rainy days, ribot atau kemarau, DUIT DUIT is very important.

Most importantly, it is for my children. For their education, for their future, too.

Some people love spending money. Well, who doesn't?
Some people spend more than they earn. How like that?
Some people do not have any savings at all. Wahpiang!
Some people spend to satiate their lusts for material things. Mampos!
Some people just love to peacock around, feeling atas but padahal, di dalam beg branded mereka takde keton...Why like that?

I've got kids & I realized the importance of saving & having money.
I cannot be selfish. Nowadays, it's not just about me, but my family is the numero uno priority.
I am grateful & thankful to Allah for all His Blessings.

Things don't come cheap anymore.
Prices for essential daily things have been & will be rising...

Take heed.
It's not too late to start saving now.
2 cents... oso can...

Don't Dream It's Over

Thanks Yan. Thanks Ayus. Thanks Syed cucu Normadiah...

Dah lah Yus, jangan ingat pape. Buang yang keroh ambil yang jernih jer lah...

Gini Yus, kita jangan buat orang, ko jangan balas burok ngan busok. Biar orang buat kita jangan kita buat balik kat orang. Ni pesan mak aku dok... Ok?

Ok go!

Betol ah kata Yati tu...
Muka macam kuda, perangai macam ba alif ba ya - buat apa dok?

Gua seram perangai orang yang cam tu dok... Tak elok...
Di keji tu...

Be yourself laa... Nak jahat biar jahat depan.
Lu jangan main casablanca.
Jangan jadi copycat. Nak ikot-ikot orang.
Jangan perasaan... Boleh dok?

Boleh kan?

Bagos. Kalau boleh, Alhamdulillah.

Lu tau, ada orang tanya gua "beb, lu takmo pakai hijab?"

Eh... Ni dah over...
Pasal ni issue, ni episode adalah very Rahim Makrop tau...

Gua tak pernah pulak tanya orang pasal hal ehwal cam ni...
Laser nyah...

Tapi, gua nyer personal opinion, gini...

Pakai hijab, ikhlas & luhur dari hati?
I think so, if I do, it must come from my sincere heart for Allah SWT.

Gua takmo nari cover, besok tak cover.
Ada acara, pakai.
Tak ada acara, buat bodoh suaa...

Gua tak main ni mcm nyer game.
Sorry mek!

Lu kan entitled to lu nyer own onion opinion...
Tu lu nyer pasal lah kan...

To each his own...
Ok Ok buah apple...?

Tak cover tak bermakna
"pompuan rugged"
atau
"pompuan havoc"

Setahu gua, jangan hati pahit macam hempedu...
Jangan hati busok & burok...

Jangan ter-shotgun anak pistol, itu lagi rabak...
Ingat, buat baik berpada-pada...
Buat jahat biar selalu...
Jahat depan, jangan jahat belakang...
Jangan eksen decent, innocent nonsense...

Tau-tau lah diri sendiri...

Yus, ingat pesan Kak-Tyra-Kesukaan-Yan-Girlfriend-Syed-Cucu-Normadiah...

Tapi, thanks eh tadi gi Sing Song.
Belanja sawersop.
Chendoi!
Sempoi!

Kao ponnn...!!!

Pod & Mini Pot

Today, the stars told me that someone would be giving us a treat...

Hmm...

Nantikan liputan seterusnya...

Happy Mother's Day

To mothers & mothers-to-be all over the universe - Happy Mother's Day

It is one heck of a job, I say.
Nonetheless, at the end of the day, it is a very fulfilling job albeit the bloody stress...

Di Suatu Petang...

Dapat beli bulu
Dapat gam free
Aisehmenn... Yahoo!
Feeling puashati

Mundar mandir cari seluar
Masok kolong, keluar kolong
Hmm... Mahal naar...
Last-last dapat jugak - bawah payong

Nama dia Raju
Bukan Badrol
Dodol Mak Wan
Makan Dodol

Jalan-jalan cari makan
Mana nak pegi?
Dah makan, kembong bonsang
Carik batteri

Jalan sana, jalan sini
masok kedai keluar kedai
Dah time nak naik teksi
Kiss kiss salam salam goodbye

Dah lama tak buat keje gini
Feelingnya genuine sekali
Gerek giler rasa happy
Lain kali kita jumpa lagi

Tima kaseh
Tima kaseh
Daun keladi
Jangan serik
Jangan serik
Happy Happy

∟ ! Ž ǻ Ŗ ß

oh you calorie-free, luscious vanilla white chocolate sweetness...

oh how i ♥ you
you are warm and tender...
ever so gentle to me

although i was and will always be bashful
you never fail to make me feel smooth

i want you back
i'll go get you again

give me more
give me more
i like it
i like it

give me more of your peppermint too

Come What May

Husband went dragonboat training in the morning.
Me slept in with Not.
When Husband got home,
"Let's Do Prata Dei!"

Had our usual crispy prata kosong at Holland.
To me it is the best in the ulagam.
Pekena pulak with aunty's chicken curry.
Fullamak! Power to the ma'...

We headdown to our usual lenggang lenggok area,
Holland V. Madang...
Nak pi jauh macam leceh gitu kan

Behtu, last minute,
Jom ah, pi Orchard Road, jan!

I thought haa... idea cantik boleh pi Times.
Before that, ada baik nyer susukan Not dulu
Masok Robinsons, terserempak ngan
Mak Busu, Yana & Akydd.

Gedebak Gedebuk Gedebish

Rezeki Not murah.
Terima kaseh Mak Busu & Family,
Not dapat rompers. Alhamdulillah
Yey!

Rilek-rilek kat McDonald's
Makan eskrim, minom air
Akydd dapat burger ramli
hee hee hee...

Pastu jalan sana, jalan sini
dapat skirt, dapat selipar ahmoi
itupon jadi.
Hepi... Tak hepi apa pulak...
Ungrateful

Last question,
"dari pihak kita, ayam 5 kilo cukop tak?"

Stoberri Sotkek Bluberri Pai

Terima kasih. Thank you.

Yes, Presiden Pai.

To you & your family, THANK YOU for the scrumpdumtious dinner!

Hip Hip Horay!!!

We truly appreciate your thoughtfulness & generosity.

InsyaAllah, next stop - MekDonerl... ikhlas dari Naib Presiden Yu.

Sepatah kata si NNPP - Pada hari penabalan (Bukan S Dhanabalan eh) jangan lupa bawak tanjak & keris untuk perasmian...

Lynn Skywalker VS Darth Vader

There I was rocking Not to sleep in his stroller and at the same time, sipping a hot tea on a Thursday afternoon, and was about to chomp on my meal when... Mr Silly (MS) just slumped himself on the armchair opposite mine...! Boy! Was I stupified! At the spur of the moment, I almost spilled my tea on my white linen bottom. I stared at him & I wondered eh-what-the-fiak???

Still dumbfounded, I couldn't quite react. I just sat there & stared at him.

He looked at me with a grin on his face, spread his legs, his hands clutching a plastic bag, he then lifted his right leg & put it on the armrest. YOUR MOTHER!!! This is too much!!!

MS: (with a lil' snigger) "you sit here alone?"

Me: (agitated) "why?!"

MS: "i sit here..."

Me: (damn flustered) "NO! You cannot sit here! what do you want?!"

(at this point he was looking at my food & he has got this silly smirk on his silly face)

Me: "You cannot sit here. I'm waiting for my husband"

Scratching himself silly, he left with a tch...

On my far left, there was an old man sitting on another armchair. I noticed there were two glasses of latte. He had a friend with him, I assumed his friend went to the restroom. Again, Mr Silly just sat himself on the armchair, spread his legs, his one hand clutching a plastic bag, lifted his right leg & put it on the armrest and guess what?! He helped himself to the latte!!!

Old man's gob was WIDE open so were his eyeballs... Flabbergasted, he looked at Mr Silly drinking his friend's latte. I probably didn't bat an eye, watching both of their actions. Old Man had his mouth opened for a while... What a pity... Surely, he was numbed... Shortly after, Old Man's friend arrived. They left & I saw him gesturing to his friend about Mr Silly.

Next, Mr Silly went to another set of armchairs - this time a guy was sitting there, reading his newspaper. Same thing, he sat himself on the armchair, spread his legs, one hand clutching a plastic bag, lifted his right leg & put it on the armrest...

OK, CONFIRMED! He's not of a sound mind lah...

I continued with my meal, Not is already fast asleep... THEN...

He came to me, fumbling with his plastic bag... He said...

MS: "you ah... why you no let me sit here?"

Me: "what do you want...?"

MS: "you ah...no good, you know..."

Me: "who are you and why you want to sit here? cannot lah!!!"
(I was miffed... annoyed oredi...)

He went on, rambling nonsense... I kept repeating "who are you" a few times...

He then said...

"I'm... I'm... I'm your father...!" He left, disappeared into thin air...

THAT'S IT!!! I can't help myself anymore...

I had a wide grin, looking silly laughing to myself...

Darth Vader... Darth Vader...

But It's Not Sane, It's Not Sane

First of all, no, I no like fairweather friends.
When you are being like that, remember, others do upon you like that as well lah...

Betol tak gengs? Heh... heh... heh...

And yes, jangan bedek ah, ok... Hee... hee... hee...

Depa boleh goreng or sugar-coated orang lain yang mungkin gullible, tapi, not just me, but manyak-manyak manusia lain pon reti dan paham bebenar sikap depa yang tak hemsem tu...

So, cakap tu biar betol, biar ikhlas... jangan nak orang see-you-up lah, ok... Tak merry hidop berbangga-bangga. Sampai bila? Makan humble pie laa...

O well O well... Some people... Takleh kurang, mesti lebih... Sepatah kata Almarhum Haji Bakhil, "Apa orang handak, kao pon handak...!"

Yor-Yor-Orr je lebih...

»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ««««««««««««««««««

The Moral of the Story...

that I've learnt in this life, don't

► vaunt
► swagger
► swank

Hokum sana, hokum sini...
Ingat Lynn... Jangan begitu...
Itu riak namanya...
Melebih-lebih, suka nah nak vainglory...

Tak usah lah...
Tak usah lah...

[InsyaAllah, ok ok I'll keep on learning, Amin ]

What A Ballas!!!

Last Saturday after breakfast, we thought it would be fun to take the boys out to Jacob Ballas' playground. Danish was excited & was looking forward to monkeying around, as usual...

Meanwhile, it started raining cats & dogs. Wahpiang! Heavy storm laa... How now brown cow? Are we still going or not, Ibu? Ok ok, let's wait awhile...

We sat & waited for almost a couple of hours, but the rain did not give way - so, no choy... We decided to go home. Boring...

Well then, too late to do anything as I had planned to meet my kakis. The original plan was for me to go away without the boys - I need some time out, but in the end Not tagged along. No poppadum lah, the more the merrier eh? Anyway, his milk supplier is none other than, ME...

So, that was Saturday...

On Sunday, we went to Holland V for breakfast and boy was I glad that it was a Sunny Sunday! Yey! And off we go to JB's playground. Very the sunny indeed, so the very humid & warm too, mann! Danish, being himself, enjoyed having loads of fun on the sand pit. He had a Ballas...!

Later we went for a walk around Botanic Gardens (with Danish leading the way, ala Ranger...) when we heard a jaipongan music from afar. Aikk?! Ek'eh best nyer! Lets go find out what going on!

We head down to the Shaw Foundation Symphony Stage. Aiyoh! Ada party lah!!!

Coincidentally, MESRA was celebrating their 20th Anniversary & Concert & the OMS was part of the performing acts. BEST LAH!!! Ada Kak Girl (Rahimah Rahim), Hyrul, Yantzen & JEFRIDIN lah!!!

It was worthwhile...

Bro Yantzen

ingat makcik ni? makcik latah "i love u" pesta pesta pesta 2006

tok jepri

kak girl

Beladi !@#$%!?*&^

What I did yesterday, I wasn't proud of.

But kononnya, to justify my impatient-ness, I confronted her...

I've been quiet (ni bunyi lagi!) all this while! Basket punya orang!!!

Since mid last year, these bloody Tiongkoks have been super inconsiderate.

They argue, fight, yell, scream, shout, to the extend of throwing things (bunyi macam tong gas pon ada), banging the door, anytime, any day bila2 dia suka. Not banyak kali had a jolt of shock from the gedebang gedebung...

I've once called the police about 2 months ago when I heard them again & that time it sounded worst & much more serious than usual.

When the police arrived, tau pon takot!!! Aramjad... They refused to open the door & stay quiet for awhile. So when the police left, MAK KAO ada sequel pulak...!!!

Percaya tuu...???

They hang their 'dirty laundry' on the galah, wet, dripping and so disgusting!

I cannot take it anymore, I've tahan-ed for a year & I finally gathered my courage to go upstairs. I told the guy (dunno whether her husband or boyfriend) about their dripping laundry. He was was apologetic & assured me it'll never happen again.

I met a couple of neighbours as I was on my way home, they bitched about those Tiongkoks. They ALL tak suka with the female occupant - they claimed that she's the troublemaker!!!

She was said to be rude & unfriendly -always blaming the neighbour next door to theirs & denied involving in any fights.

But yesterday, was like the last straw for me. We heard lots of commotion, really loud banging and it was just after mignight. I told Husband "If I hear one more, I'll go upstairs..."

A moment soon, hah kao!!! Super loud banging noise! Apa lagi, I went upstairs lah...

I was greeted by a very unfriendly face, things & shoes & what nots were strewn all over the corridor outside them house, she was throwing things in action... As I walked towards her, she came barging towards me. Of course, I was defensive, I asked her what was going on. I said it was late, she looked like she was going to strike me, she came forward. I gave her a lot of 'pieces of my mind' and my two dollars worth. Then I noticed the rest of our 16th storey neighbours were standing by... some were saying Ya! Ya! No brain ah?! Late oredi!! Always fight! Gila!

She pretended to look stupid & blur... Yayapapaya only lah...

Yah, she said to me, not her, it was next door neighbour...Nak mampos?! Nak tipu ke apa? All those things strewn all over tu sape punya? Next door neighour put it there is it? Apa? Aku ni potek ke?

I told her many things I'm not proud of & I told her to be more considerate as I have a baby & bla bla bla..

One more time... police come... but what can they do right?

nasib ah... sialan... bloody tiongkoks...

Sicko

Who likes getting sick? I hope nobody does.

Not a good feeling in the world isn't it?

Well, last couple of weekends ago, I had what I called a "last minute" fever.

Apa jer...

I was feeling good that Friday and was looking forward to my weekend when... I felt poorly in the middle of the night. I thought it was just the usual tension headaches, but woke up the next morning with a "batu-besar-dalam-ada-dudok" in my head.

Fullamak! I really donch like that feeling. Husband took his Favourite-Gadget-of-the-Moment and Click! Beep! - "Alamak Sayang, You've Got a Temperature..." not once, but twice I was Clicked! Beeped!...

Left-38.5°C Right-38.3°C

No wonder lah I felt like beep beep...

The plan that day was to go to meet the Bakrians & others. Initially, I wasn't sure if we'd go, with my fever & all, but since Mak Puteh 'cajoled' (bukan kojol) me into going saying that she'll pick us up. We went, but came by taxi...! Don't ask... Just don't ask...

So, make short story long... eh... When we arrived at the door, Not was overwhelmed by the hustle & bustle of activities happening in Pak Ngah's house and many, many people to meet - so when his Nek Yang carried him in her arms, apa lagi... Not burst out crying uncontrollably!

Member cried for over 2 hours, only to have a couple of seconds break intermittenly...

- Mak Puteh & Yuyui brought him downstairs
- I took him to the corridor
- I tried feeding him
- Husband took him downstairs for a walk
- Pak Ngah took him to his air-conditioned bedroom

ALL DID NOT WORK daa...

I seriously lost my appetite - due to fever & Not's crying... Gua give up daa...

Husband suggested, Marilah Mak Eh, Kita Balik...

So we bid our farewells & salams & kisses - off we go...

Then, the moment we told the taxi driver to take us home, guess what???

Si Not ni... was all smiles in the taxi...

Masam kan budak ni?

Buang tebiat???

When we got home, Not was his happy & smiley self again, cooing, blabbering and making throaty sounds as usual...

He's ok, rite? Ok... I resume my tido...

The following Friday we went for bowling & steamboat sessions... Then, a couple of days afterwards, Sunday gave me another present... Influenza daa...

Ya Allah, give me strength & patience. Amin.

Until today, I'm still feeling kerampesz...

Thanks to you yang kasi I jangkitan ini & jangan 'secrep recipe' eh...

Saja Jer...